the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
You know you're on day 1 of your period when the new mcdonalds commercial makes you cry
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
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