i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
I also tried to drunkenly adopt a kitten last night. It didn't pan out.
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
Randomize
