just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
remember about an hour ago when i told you i was never drinking again? i may or may not be mixing malibu with caprisun. just saying.
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
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