What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
I love Texas men! TSA agent found my vibrator, nodded approvingly, and said, “You have a nice night, ma’am” with a cowboy accent. I almost made out with him on the spot
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