Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
I now know he's been cheating for a while. I also know HER name, address, phone number, Facebook account, religion and zodiac sign. I feel like I'm earning my restraining order. Point is, never fuck over a librarian.
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
Randomize