The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
no. you can't hotbox the world.
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
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He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
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Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START