Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
There's a mirror laying face down next to me. A looooong full body mirror. By the looks of it it fell off the wall last night and was within centimeters of shattering on my head. Awesome.
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
This Girl Got Ghosted By Her BF Of 5 Years While On A Trip They Took For Her Birthday
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
People Are Applauding Chrissy Teigen For Getting Candid About Breast-Pumping
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.