I'm smoking weed out of a trumpet
I just did a slip and slide down the hall way of my apartment building
Tie
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
Randomize
