Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
At this point, I would light birthday candles in my vagina for free drinks
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
He was gone for 5 minutes, opened the car door and said, "Don't eat my shit." and dropped Chipotle on the passenger seat. He was gone for another 10 minutes and came back with Coldstone. That stoned.
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
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