try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
Randomize
