love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
I don't remember because I was drunk out of my mind, but I have it on good authority that weed cinnamon buns at 3 in the morning with chocolate milk are better than sex.
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
Randomize
