you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
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