hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
I wish Michael J Fox could read me bedtime stories
He could rock you to sleep
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
Randomize
