i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
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