idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
you wrote "5 million dollars" in the tip line for the pizza delivery man and insisted that he deserves it
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
Watching her eat just hurts me
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
Someone I just met told me they were going to name their kid after me. Daylight savings is weird.
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
Randomize
