Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
Apparently, the right response to, "How do you feel about a terrorist being in the area?" isn't, "Well, we have vodka in the freezer, so we're good for now."
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
I'm high, watching "Scream" and eating a grilled cheese sandwich off my boobs. I'm not going anywhere
Come on, clusterfuck. Put on a pushup bra and get your fine ass to the bar, or you will be a sad single stoner forever
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
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