you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
Turned the water balloon filler into a jungle juice fire extinguisher. Please call me tomorrow afternoon and make sure that i'm still alive.
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
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