Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
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