ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
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She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
She cheated on me with the same state trooper that wrote me a ticket.
I guess now you have a way to keep your license when you bring that up in court.
Dude, you are the most awesome.
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
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I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
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