She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
This is getting exciting. I almost wanna turn off all the lights, get some popcorn, and stare at my phone screen to see if she's going to say yes or not
And on a much sadder note, I'm way to drunk for this right now
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
Randomize