dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
Randomize
