it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
Sext me about skeletons
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
Randomize
