we have pet lesbian snakes
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
My dad called me in the middle of the night, drunk on vodka, asking for references on the Irish alphabet.
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
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