so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
Now that I'm the boss, there's nobody to yell at me for smelling like a bar in the morning.
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
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