you guys were way drunker than both of me
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
the room spins SO much faster in panama
my taxi driver is listening to 50 shades of grey audiobook. this is uncomfortable.
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
Apparently duct taping your dick to your buttcheks before the first time she goes down on you isn't as funny as projected. She cried because she thought I was a girl the whole time.
I went in the hotel's jacuzzi fully clothed, threw up in the bathroom half an hour later and woke up naked next to Dr. Seuss' "Oh the Places You'll Go"
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