ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
I just walked in on my roommate beating off with no pants on, an unbuttoned hawaiian shirt and a cowboy hat, and he weights 300 pounds
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I cannot be with a girl who won't let me come home on my lunch break, eat spicy ranch and watch Breaking Bad without pants on. #lesbianproblems
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
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