I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
What part of don't open in front of your kids didn't you understand? Astroglide, magnums, fuzzy handcuffs and a blindfold are going to be hard to explain as friends presents.
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
Randomize
