Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
Randomize