Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
This is the high leading the old right now
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
Randomize
