I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
Just killed a snake in my bed! And by killed I mean hit repeatedly with my fist. And by snake I mean a lump in the covers. And I pissed my pants.
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
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