Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
You're the only guy I know who could convince a lady at the pharmacy to trade you her pain pills for your antibiotics.
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
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