I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
There were firefighters and a fire truck up the street. I asked what was wrong and their exact words were "Just a tiny explosion; it'll be all right"
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
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