All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
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