i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
Randomize
