Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
the roommate is literally cooking green eggs n ham, and I'm too hungover to see straight. Dr Seuss nightmare.
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