she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
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