its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
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