people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
I swear, if I find out you're lying, I'm going to put your name on one of those herpes watch websites and put the link up on every social networking site in existence.
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
His hands were made for my vagina.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
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