Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
Randomize
