My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
Randomize
