ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
My gynecologist just said "don't worry, this won't be as hard as…well…" A FUCKING SEX JOKE NO
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
Randomize