Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
As if me making pizza in a skillet wasn't enough proof that I was in no state to be cooking, this burn blister on my hand is
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
Make me a sandwich
The day you make me feel like my detachable showerhead does I'll make you a sandwich.
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
My new years resolution is going to be to stop drunk snapchatting old hook ups asking them when we're going to bang again
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
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