well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
So in the middle of making out, he decided to give me a breast exam. God I love dating a doctor. He saved me a $20 copay.
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
Randomize
