I'm really into asian looking animals
Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
I saw a kid peeing outback so I yelled "you have a small pecker, but its ok cuz when life gives you lemons..." and proceeded to throw lemons at him
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
Randomize
