were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
Randomize
