if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
your thong is hanging out like whoa
Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
You're gonna have to start calling my house phone from now on
How come?
Cuz 'Dad' looked pretty similar to the word Dane when i sent that picture message
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forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
Based off of the soaking wet clothes/towels/rugs, Eiffel Tower statue and monkey in the bathtub, I'm going to assume drunk me took a bath.
Are you really alive right now?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
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