He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
Randomize
