He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
We fucked, she finished, high fived me, the pulled a celebratory pack of gushers out of her purse for each of us. I'm going to marry your sister dude.
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
Randomize