Just found my car keys in your throw-up.
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize