i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
She needs sedatives and a leash
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
Is there a reason drunk me put drunk you's phone in the freezer?
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
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