That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called.
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
Guy Shares All The ‘New Discoveries’ He’s Made Since Moving In With His Girlfriend And It’s Hilariously Relatable
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...