His mom just asked me if I was "fooling around with her baby again" and then when I walked downstairs his dad YELLED "Look who's taking the walk of shame!"
You really need to stop fucking dudes who still live with their parents.
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
Woke up to pictures of me cooking wings with a blow torch.
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
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