My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
I am full of burrito and curiosity
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
Randomize
