I don't do stupid things anymore. I do stupid people.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
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I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
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Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
the liver wants what the liver wants
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
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