He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
Randomize
