i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
Who knew that being in a committed relationship is the same thing as forced celibacy? Did not sign up for this.
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
totally just realized while washing my face that Cetaphil looks like semen.
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
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